Saturday, April 13, 2013

learning

learning.

 it is a continual process. there are several areas in which I've been learning.

I've been working through learning how to love someone who is difficult to love. and...well, hmmph. first, it is such a lie to think that I will ever completely master something on this earth.( a lesson or concept God is trying to teach me) But guess who tells herself that she does learn things and is an expert in any given area of her choosing? this girl.

 specifically in this situations I'm dealing with, why would I think I should give up on someone, or stop investing in him/her because it's draining? Can you imagine what it's like to be God? "well dang, there she goes again." Even when I screw up, God still shows me mercy, loves me, and forgives me; not because of anything I have done, no, all of God's grace in my life is because of His Son's work on my behalf. So, if I believe that and I'm thankful for how Jesus intercedes for me, shouldn't I be trying to live and love people in that way? um. is that even a questions? duh. God has been reminding me about living out the things I think about and have "deep convictions" about. Lacey, if you really, truly believe this, why are you not acting on that belief?

Right now, I'm in a very busy season of my life. I've been realizing how draining "just" working is. heh. The fantastic thing about working is it.is.always.there. It's so demanding. Don't get me wrong, I love my job, I really do! I have learned SO much. Work is so steady, it will always be there; and while I'm consistently fulfilling my role and showing up to work, God is teaching me a lot about rest. What is real rest? I'm not just talking about sleeping, I'm referencing s  l  o  w  i  n  g down and making memories. When I am about to make a decision about plans, I try to think before making hasty promises I can't keep. I'm learning that it isn't bad to say no to good things. I've also been taking time to ponder. Particularly when it comes to reading the bible, lately, I've been trying to meditate and not rush through reading the bible so I can check it off my list.

Most of all, I've been learning about how big God is and how small I am. My mind has been blown by the simplicity and power of the book of Ephesians. It is so encouraging to gather together with women at church and discuss the bible. There are no agendas, just eager women seeking to understand what God is trying to tell us in his word. He has been so faithful to me in giving me understanding and a desire for his word. Jesus has also just been blessing me again and again with raising support for my trip to Costa Rica. AH! seriously. every penny that has been given to me has a story and a purpose, and that purpose is most definitely not to make much of Lacey. I'm so thankful for people who have gathered around me and have poured into me with financial support, as well as those friends that keep asking me about how things are going and encouraging me. You know who you are and you rock! :) God is SO much bigger and greater and more majestic than I could ever comprehend and yet he bestows little blessing to me to point me back to him.

one of those little things is babysitting. babysitting? yep. i just have this indescribable love for people. So when I have the chance to be a kid again and romp around without a care in the world, it makes me smile. it does my soul well to laugh and talk with young people about life, i love hearing their perspective. another little blessing is music. I am that crazy person on the roads driving with the windows rolled all the way down, with music blaring, worshiping and or dancing. it makes me very happy to worship God with music. how cool is it that we can talk to God through song?! but also, music conveys a lot of emotion and whether it's happy or sad, music, of any genre deeply affects me.it's fun to listen to someone sing about the same things you are thinking about or feeling. something that has always made me feel SO alive is the weather. yeah. i know. but really. whenever I walk outside and see the bright blue sky filled with fluffy white clouds, and feel a breeze blowing through my hair, and how the warm yellow sun is making everything look so full of life, i just grin from ear to ear. i swear i have cracks in my face from smiling so often ;)

believe it or not, i still have a lot more to say, but this is it for now. If you made it this far, awesome ;)

//listening to//

  • country radio
  • passion: let the future begin album 
  • james taylor
  • john mayer
//reading//

  • I am not but I know I am- Louie Giglio
  • The bible
  • To Kill a Mockingbird (again)
  • Multiply-Francis Chan (well kind of, i started it)

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

the absence of my posts...

...has been due to the fact that a lot has been going on in my life so here is a brief summary:


1) Poetry. Ah, I love me some good poetry. Recently, I have read a few poems from a friend who, in my opinion is a fabulous writer. I asked to share his work with you and he agreed to allow me to post one of his poems. Now, one of the main reasons I particularly like this poem is because I.love.stuffed.animals. I mean, c'mon, think about it, who is loyal, cuddly, always listening, and squishy? My stuffed animals that's who! ;)

So here is Andrew's work:


Fabric of Frienship

I was once your boyhood boon
We'd be together beneath every moon.
Every night was an adventure on which we'd embark.
Remember every memory made on tiptoe in the dark?
You were so scared of monsters below the bed
But you'd never check you'd just hold me instead.
We would build forts when we were supposed to sleep
You told me your secrets I always will keep.
But There came I time when I was outgrown.
Slowly You changed and left me alone
I once was a friend you knew you could trust.
Now I'm alone in the dark and the dust.
I'm somewhere hidden in the back of your mind
I'm a monster below the bed you're too scared to find
I knew one day you'd forget that I exist
I just never imagined it hurting like this.
You made me more than a heart full of fluff
But sometimes miracles aren't enough.
So I'll wait until you're ready to care

About this silly old teddy bear.

2)  I've raised almost half of my goal to get to Costa Rica! God keeps blowing me away. He is my provider!

3)Work is super busy.always. It keeps me on my toes. In other news, I've become a registered Pharmacy technician, woot! :)

4)  I joined an Ephesians bible study at church, which has been extremely encouraging.
    a) *side note* I met an Australian today...at bible study. I just wanted to sit and listen to her talk...forever ;)

5)God has been working in me and I have so many random things to write about but I just haven't made time to sit and focus on typing out my thoughts.Hopefully, I'll get those posts written up soon.

6) As crazy as it sounds, I missed being forced to write. I've always loved to write, and being in a structured environment helps honing in on writing skills, which I've been lacking in.

7) Exercise. *sigh* I tried getting back into jogging and alternating with Pilates every other day. Every thing was going as planned, I was running strong and consistent. Pilates was kicking butt! Then...then I almost dislocated my knee cap again ,ugh, back to discouragement in the exercise arena. I'm going to give swimming and cycling a shot, though. I would like to find some sort of exercise I can do faithfully, well, that's the goal at least.