Wednesday, December 7, 2011

there is a time

        "For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven"

Ecclesiastes 3:1

Isn't that a strange concept? That there is a time for everything? Even in the small amount of years that I have lived on this planet, I have experienced many things. 
  • Death
  • Life/Birth
  • Weddings
  • Funerals
  • Joy
  • Deep sorrow
Yet, even through all of those earthly struggles, God provides me with his faithfulness and steadfast love. In the pleasant times in life, God can often be distant. Of course he is still a loving God, but he becomes a prized possession placed on a pedestal, only made "use" of when one is in desperate times. As a human, I am more dedicated to God when life is rough. God, however, is always steadfast, immovable. 

"Change is hard because people overestimate the value of what they have—and underestimate the value of what they may gain by giving that up."

Giving with a thankful heart can be easy at times. It is hard to give over control, though. Sin dominates every area of life, therefore it is second nature. When God calls us to give up ourselves, and take upon us the cross daily, it can be is hard. Submission is frowned upon in a culture that abhors being dependent on anything or anyone. My relationship with Christ is completely different. I'm dependent on Him because he is my life line; He is the I.V. pumping life-giving fluids into me. Without him I would be desolate, forgotten by the world, and condemned to hell, I would face an eternity without him.

{Without Him, I would be without him.}

Recently, I've been doing a lot of emotional fall cleaning. I was under a lot of self imposed stress. College decisions were constantly on my mind, I couldn't think without dwelling on some aspect of the future. On Sunday, I was taking a math test and I couldn't remember a formula. That flicked the tip of my iceberg off. Everything downward spiraled from that point on. I began to cry, and cry, and cry. I used up plenty of tissue paper. (oops, I killed some trees) From the discussion with my parents, it was resolved that this is my first "big girl" decision. Basically, my parents will support me wherever I will be going to college. The wisdom my parents want to impart to me is this, think long term. I surely do not want to exit college with mounds and mounds of debt, it would be a step in the wrong direction after college, and would hinder me. I realized that I had been trying to hold the reigns of the horses of my life. ((which, by the way, is impossible)) God, and only God, is the one who knows all of my plans, dreams, and desires, even before I think them. How could I not trust him? It was a battle between emotions and being level headed. While I'm still figuring out where God would have me, the difference in me is I have an enormous amount of peace. I am trusting in him to sustain me, as he always does. I'm resting in his sovereignty.

After that emotional burden was lifted, I was able to babysit some kiddos that are very special to me. My weekend couldn't have began better :)


  1. Awww...I love you kiddo!! :O) God is with you...don't box anything out...lay your heart and desires before Him...He will lead you!!

  2. Lacey, I can not tell you how glad I am to hear that -I- am not completely the only girl on the face of this planet earth that's constantly having this go through her brain, with same convictions and desires, too. Not that I'm glad you're having this, uh, you know what I mean:). ...And my prob. I'm a horse-y rider, and yes...I tend to want a lot of control.:P Sometimes it feels as if we have to regress to progress, emotionally and physically. I hurts, but what I've learned to ask... what's not worth the greatness of knowing Jesus better??:) <3 U!!

    " Cause it's not enough,
    It's not enough, just to say that you're okay
    I need your hurt,
    I need you pain,
    It's not love any other way" <3 ~Tenth Ave.- Any Other Way <3

  3. I love you and those kids your watching! Thanks for being you.

  4. Kait-- This is only the beginning. The beginning of always having to be dependent of God. Of course I have needed to be dependent on him, but now more than ever! The future holds more decisions and uneasiness, hold on tight :D That tenth avenue north song is so good! Perfect :)